Glory

Easter.  It is my most favorite holiday.  Ever.

"One day eyes that are blind will see you clearly 

And one day all who deny will finally believe 

One day hearts made of stone will break in pieces 

And one day chains once unbroken will fall down at your feet 

So we wait for that one day..come quickly...We want to see your Glory, 

Every knee falls down before thee, Every tongue offers you praise with every hand raised, Singing Glory, To you and unto you only, We'll sing Glory to Your name "--Nichole Nordeman

5:45 AM

I used to love the mornings.

For as long as I can remember, I've been a morning person.  Both of my parents were up every morning at 5AM (even on the weekends)...so all I've ever known is to wake up early...and to enjoy waking up early.  I married a non-morning person, so I was still able to keep my morning routine when I got married....wake up, spend time with the Lord, and workout...all by myself.

Choosing books for morning reading time

When I had just Emmanuel, he woke up around 6:30AM, so I was still able to get up before him and do my morning routine.  However, Reese's arrival in our lives and Eli's work responsibilities means that every person in our house is up by 5:45AM.  When Reese was little, I would wake up at 5AM, transfer him to the stroller (he was still sleeping) and go out for a walk.  But, as the weeks passed and the hours of missed sleep began to add up, I realized that for my health and my sanity, I could no longer wake up at 5AM.  Now I wake up when everybody else does, with absolutely no time to prepare for the day.

The days of enjoying my morning coffee solo...spending time with the Lord before the sun comes up...and walking by myself to the sound of the birds chirping in the morning...are long gone.  I do think that those days will return, but for now, there is no stillness in my house in the morning.  There is the hustle and bustle of trying to fix breakfast for everyone, ironing Eli's clothes, making sure Emmanuel goes to the potty and brushes his teeth, making sure we get our books in order to read that morning...and well, running to the coffee maker to enjoy a cup in the midst of all of the morning craziness.

Looking outside at big brother playing

It is different, but I am learning to appreciate the evening hours.  There is nothing better than a baby and a small child who smell good enough to eat, and my kids smell perfectly delicious after their bath at nighttime.

And, after they drift to sleep, my house is still.  It is quiet.  I can take my time...be with the Lord...and appreciate that we made it through another day.

Unfortunately I don't hear the birds chirp at night, but I am learning...slowly learning...to appreciate the music that crickets make.

Carolina...priceless gem...

Today in the mail I received an unexpected package...and I began to tear up.

Our dear friends blessed my socks off with Carolina shirts for Emmanuel and Reese.  I know...it seems pretty insane to "tear up," but I LOVED Carolina, and I am a Tar Heel through and through.  I met some of my closest girlfriends at college.  I became intimate with Jesus in a new and exciting way.  I loved college.  I have been dying to dress my boys in something other than Tennessee orange...and today that dream became a reality (woot!).  We opened the package, and I immediately started belting out the alma mater and the fight song...to which Emmanuel and Reese started jumping around going crazy.

As we prepare for our bathtime routine, Emmanuel is walking around holding his Carolina shirt asking to wear it to bed...

It looks like we're going to have to make a trip to Chapel Hill.

...so, it's Rah, Rah, Car'lina, 'lina
Rah, Rah, Car'lina, 'lina,
Rah, Rah, Car'lina, 'lina
RAH, RAH, RAH!

Calm, Cool, and Collected?

They say that once you've had your first child and gotten out all of your neurotic tendencies...(you know those that I am talking about...washing every piece of clothing ahead of time...sterilizing every bottle...researching the most perfect place to buy fresh fruits and veggies to puree for their first tastes...babyproofing like crazy so that they don't have an accident)...well, I hear that after your first, you loosen up with the second.  You don't worry as much.  You introduce foods earlier.  You don't care if they eat day old crumbs that your toddler (or older children) left on the floor.  It's easier...you're a veteran...it's the best time of your life.

Emmanuel convincing Reese to do something mischievous. 

Hmmm...I was definitely not included in these studies.

1.  I find myself vacuuming every night because Reese is a mover and a shaker and will put ANYTHING IN HIS MOUTH!  He has a ton of teething toys that he could put in his mouth...but his "toy" of choice is anything made of paper (hmmm...Emmanuel's books look good to eat), any plant (mom won't mind if I try a piece of her greenery), anything plastic (the plastic bags at the self-checkout line look yummy...now if I just reach over the side of the grocery cart, I can get to them).  My firstborn didn't really put anything in his mouth...but Reesie Pooh stuffs in any and everything.

Reesie showing his two teeth, which debuted on December 27, 2010.  

2.  I meticulously separate Reese's clothes so that they can be washed in his special detergent.  This doesn't sound like a big deal, but when you are so sleep-deprived and busy that you wash your brand new cell phone in the washing machine...separating the clothes is a huge deal.  We just found out today that E has a mild case of eczema, too....so I've decided to wash the whole family's clothes in fragrance-free detergent to make life a little easier.

Playtime before a bath!

3.  And the food...oh, mercy.  I've written about Reese's food preferences before (savory over sweet)...but he has discovered picking up foods (and has pretty much mastered the pincer grip), so he picks up anything that anybody puts in front of him.  Needless to say that he has almost choked a handful of times (I know he has to learn), but I find myself chopping his finger foods just a little smaller than chunky-sized...just in case.

I love this dirty little face! 

So, it's different...not easier...not less stressful...just a different experience.

The one thing that I have realized is my constant need for God's grace over myself and my children.  My grandma Mae Ella, one of the wisest and strongest women I've ever known, had a saying written on her mirror.  It read, "God, nothing is going to happen today that You and I can't handle."  I remember reading that as a teenager and realizing that Yes, God truly is in control and He will take care of us.  He equips us with what we need.  He doesn't leave us hanging.  Period.  It's not fancy, complicated theology...It's a simple belief that God is sovereign and He's got it under control.

As my infant enters and masters the age of exploration, my toddler-almost-pre-schooler, is testing the limits...with potty-training, obeying adults the first time, throwing tantrums, saying "No!" and everything else you can imagine.  I find myself exhausted and grace-less at the end of the day.  I am constantly reminded that God's grace is new every morning...

...and as God pours out new mercies upon me... I need to follow suit with my own children.

He's already standing up in the crib....pushing up on the coffee table...and cruising...wow!

Every day, new grace...every day, new mercy.